Getting What You Want, Without Manipulation

Power of not overreacting to other people and how it can help open the door to advancing towards your goals and dreams.

Transcription

Getting what you want without manipulation?

Hi I’m Brian Pombo, welcome back to Brian J. Pombo Live.

Tonight we are back in the secret headquarters of BrianJPombo.com, and I want to talk with you a little bit about a little secret that I learned years ago. This has made all the difference in my life, and that is how to get what you want, especially out of other people without manipulation.

Now, there’s a caveat to this.

The caveat is, it all depends on your definition of manipulation.

Really, if you consider manipulation to be anything that causes a person to do something that they wouldn’t have done without your interference, then this doesn’t qualify this is manipulation, because it does require interference, but it requires the minimal amount of interference. And I’ll show you exactly how that happens.

It goes back to a story I was talking with my eldest nephew and niece, who are both adult age now.

We were discussing, you know, the things that they’re looking to do in life, specifically my niece, and we were talking about the things that are holding her back. How it specifically comes to certain people in her life, and how those people are the ones that are kind of holding the keys to what she needs to take the next step in her life, or at least that’s how she sees it.

I said, well, really in the end, we got down to the guts of it. And it was a constant frustration that was creating even depression in her because she feels so out of control and out unable to be able to take the next step.

I walked her through it and I walked her through this very simple idea. If you can keep from getting frustrated with people who are angry, frustrated themselves, annoying, manipulative themselves. If you can keep from being annoyed by them, if you can keep if you could just have a little enough distance, mentally, in your own mind, from them and their reactions to you, if you can keep from reacting to them, you win.

And you end up getting everything you want in the long run. Now, in the meantime, what it will cause even decent people, it will cause them to get angrier, to get more upset, to fight you more and fight everything about what you’re attempting to do.

But that’s only in the short run in the long run, they end up doing what you want, or they become irrelevant in the process, you find a way around them.

This doesn’t matter if it’s someone that’s super close to you. It doesn’t matter if it’s somebody that’s just a one time you know, the person at the DMV, it does not matter.

The important thing is that you do not react to them. If you do not react to them and they react to you, you win. Guaranteed is that manipulation, it’s only manipulation, the fact that you don’t comply to them.

If you consider that manipulation, then yeah, it’s manipulation.

But in my mind, that’s not manipulation in my mind, that is me continuing to be me and not allowing you to manipulate me, you say and the same thing with you.

Same thing would be true, whoever it is, it doesn’t matter. Your sex, it doesn’t matter. Your religion, nothing.

If you can keep from being flipped by other people emotionally, then you got it made.

You can get whatever you want out of anyone or you can find a way around them. That’s the only issue with this. It takes patience, it takes time.

And that’s a lot of things that most of us don’t naturally have. But it can be built up like a skill like a muscle, it can be built up over time. Simple advice.

Little more difficult to practice, right off the bat, especially if you’re used to if you’ve already built up a habit of reacting to people. But if you can work towards being less reactive, your entire life gets better automatically guaranteed.

Now in the short run, it may look like it’s getting worse because everyone comes at you. Because if they can’t control you, you know what ends up happening. They’re gonna try harder, right?

But that’s okay because they really can’t, if you don’t give in.

A simple idea, and it’s also a way that you could be able to help people get over their own stuff, if you can show them that you don’t need to react, then they don’t need to react either.

A lot of people will thank you for it in the long run. Hopefully that’s helpful to you. Hopefully it makes sense. If not, rewind it, rewatch it again, some time or re listen to it, depending on wherever you’re getting this.

It’s very simple, but will make a big difference.

It’s a part one of the three pillars of BrianJPombo.com, which is being reality grounded. If you can stay reality grounded. You win the game, it is the most important pillar, the strongest pillar and of the three that we talk about here.

You want to find out what the other two are. Tune in next time. We talk about them nearly every time whether I say it specifically or not. If you want to find out more on the entire how to really take these ideas and how to put them into use via strategies.

Go check out my book, 9 Ways to Amazon-Proof Your Business. You can get a free copy at AmazonProofBook.com. We’ll be back tomorrow night. In the meantime, you get out there and let the magic happen.